PURN NOTICE
JUSTIN PURNELL was killed yesterday in a hasty and miraculously successful reconnaissance mission to Peter McManus Cafe. Purnell’s assassin, enjoying a frosty beverage at a bar just up the street, thought to check the UCB hangout in the off-chance that his target was there. Sure enough, when he arrived at McManus, Mr. Purnell was one of the very few people in the establishment.
Not content to shoot his target and be done with it, Purnell’s assassin played the long con, claiming he was on the run from his assassin and expressing relief to find a fellow player who could grant him immunity. Once Mr. Purnell’s trust in his own safety had returned, the assassin took a trip to the restroom, cocked his trusty weapon and kicked the lavatory door open, firing a barrage of darts into his trusting and unsuspecting target.
Goodbye, Justin.
Ladies and gentlemen, this is some ice-cold shit.
Who on earth would forego a clear shot just to win his target’s trust again before killing him?
This assassin has a cocky attitude. He’s choosing Statham over Reno, flashy over stealthy, bait-and-switch style over foam-and-rubber substance. And the worst part is, it’s working. And Justin should have known better than to believe a single word of it.
THIS IS NOT JUST A GAME OF RUNNING AND SHOOTING. THIS IS A GAME OF LIES AND BETRAYAL, INFORMANTS AND MANIPULATION, PARANOID SPRINTING TO YOUR APARTMENT DOOR AND FIELDING WEIRD LOOKS ON THE TRAIN BECAUSE YOU’RE AN ADULT HIPSTER CARRYING A CHILD’S TOY.
IF A PLAYER RUNS INTO THE BAR YOU ARE ALONE IN AND CLAIMS YOU ARE NOT THEIR TARGET, THEY ARE SPOUTING A GEYSER OF GRADE-A BULLSHIT AND IF YOU THINK THEY ARE TELLING THE TRUTH YOU WILL DIE. YOU ARE NEVER SAFE. TRUST NO ONE.
